Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
