I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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