You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
