So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
i think i just lost a toe
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
