There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
