Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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