Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize