He is an equal opportunity slut.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize