it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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