So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
