I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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