The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
