Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
