Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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