My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
