Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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