i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I'm always down for nudity.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
