This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
