16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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