I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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