all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
