Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I have aggressive nipples.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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