I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
