Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
