do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
high people should be assigned attendants
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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