dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
