i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
It's just like the Real World with babies
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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