Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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