The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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