just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I just googled if crying burns calories
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
