Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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