Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
