if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
