So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
