How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
