But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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