Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize