I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Everything about him screamed your future.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
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