I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
