did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Randomize
