Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
where am i from again
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Holy shit dude........stairs
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
