the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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