i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
