We're like a lot better than the average bears
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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