that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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