i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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