So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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