if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
