ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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