Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Randomize
